An acquaintance recently received an email at work which offered access to the Microsoft Software Assurance Employee Purchase Program. I don’t really see a problem with this program, other than it is less convenient than just going to the store and buying the software or devices. You do get a slight discount over the retail rate of about 10% on the products I checked compared to Newegg.
However, I would like to see equal opportunity for non-Microsoft products, so I wrote up the following email for GNU/Linux (with an emphasis on my beloved Ubuntu) as a spoof on the original. Whether the acquaintance will send this on to the company remains to be seen.
From: Ben Rousch
Sent: Wednesday, July 08, 2009
To: All People
Subject: GNU/Linux Software Freedom ProgramWith the GNU/Linux Software Freedom Program (GLSFP), anyone in the world – employed or not – can get software at no cost. Products currently available* for free download include the Ubuntu Linux operating system (which is IMMUNE TO CURRENT VIRUSES), the OpenOffice.org office suite (which has NO ANNOYING RIBBON MENU), thousands of games WITHOUT ANNOYING ADS OR MALWARE, and other software to do almost ANYTHING YOU CAN IMAGINE. All at no cost!
Taking advantage of the GLSFP is easy. Begin downloading today!
– Get started by visiting http://www.ubuntu.com/
NO ANNOYING LOGINS OR SIGNUPS ARE NECESSARY
Please note that GLSFP software is only available until the heat death of the universe. Many orders can be shipped to PO boxes, but most people prefer to just download it (yes, that is legal, and is in fact encouraged). Your GLSFP downloads are not conditioned on your employee status. See http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/gpl.html for details.
We trust you will enjoy this benefit provided by the Free Software Community and look forward to your participation.
Although the GLFSP does not actually exist, the free software is for real and is used by millions of people around the world and behind the scenes of most – if not all – Fortune 500 companies in some capacity. Internet behemoths like Google and Amazon are taking advantage of GNU/Linux software, so why shouldn’t you?
* Availability does not vary by country, and prices are not subject to change. All products are available in all regions. GLSFP software is yours to use and modify as you see fit.
